05.30.2020 THE MORE I SEEK IN DESPERATION, THE MORE DESPERATE I BECOME.
My art. My pursuit of where I am as an artist, of where my art fits? What my art says? How and where my art sells? These questions and the like, have been bombarding my thoughts and affecting how I create art.
Getting back into creating art has been uplifting. When I have an idea for Zen, or one of the other characters, I am excited to execute my vision.
But, when I focus on or even wonder where such art is going to sell, I am stunned into non-movement. What is the point of creating artwork that just sits in my house or on my computer? If my art doesn't sell, it's worthless. I am worthless. Ah-ha!
From this standpoint I desperately seek a way, a place to sell my art. In my last desperate state, I fell upon the idea of mugs.
Now, mugs may eventually turn out to be a great idea for selling my art. But, not now. Not stemming from thoughts and energy of desperation.
Desperation clouds my vision. I can't see nor sense the bigger picture that the Universe has available to me right now.
I am rushing around shrouded in fear, lack, and frustration desperately trying to find where I fit.
I fit right where I am. Here in this moment.
The more I am at Peace with who and where I am now, right now, the closer I come to what the Universe has in store, RIGHT NOW, for me. Whatever that is, I know that is is far greater than what I can even access in the state of desperation.
I am willing to let go of forcing my art to sell someplace and to instead work on developing my skill as an artist.
It will be interesting to see what shows up!