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Breaking Promises To Myself

12.22.2020 This morning I awoke feeling like a fraud. That, this is not good. It doesn't feel good in any way. I am so out of alignment with Source.

What was the train of though that inspired this feeling? What is the underlying perpetual thought or belief that keeps playing in the background over and over and over?

A major part of this hard, crunchy, uncomfortable feeling is the fact that I have not taken the time to sit down and create. I have been telling, promising myself really, for over a week that I am going to sit down at my art work space and experiment with some clay ideas and inspirations or play with using watercolor pencils on some of my fired pieces.

And yet, I have done nothing! This is where the feeling originated. From this promise to myself that I did not keep. See, I knew journaling would allow me to discover the culprit.

I'm feeling better already. :)

Over the past week, I have been getting ready to move into an art space rental. Whew! (I will go more into that in another post.) Running around from store to store in search of the perfect table, desk, shelving or whatever. Measuring, designing the space on paper.*

Holding the energy in my head of "gotta get this done" and "how do I make this perfect?"

All the while dreaming of creating art, promising to sit down, relax and let the artistic energy flow. Only to get up the next day to scramble around the next day to search.

I have not found any piece of furniture that fits my idea of how I want my space to feel.

So, I'm letting that stuff go. Today. Now. I am going to breathe, sit down today and just create art. Or I will take the time to add color to this tiny, elf guy I created weeks ago.

This is how he looks now. Stay tuned to see how he will look tomorrow, with color!

Thanks for allowing me to process here.

Be Joyful!

*On Sunday, my wonderful, supportive husband went down to Ground Floor Artists with me. He measured the space and drew up a layout with furniture suggestions. I just stood and gabbed about clay and art with one of the other tenants, Lea. :)

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